16. The contours of chance. By Violeta Nadurille.

The contours of chance (My story of 缘分 with China)

By Violeta Nadurille

Violeta wrote this story also in Spanish.

Choose “Spanish” on the scroll-down menu above.

There is, in Chinese, a concept called yuánfèn (缘分). It refers to the belief that there are facts that come together for something to happen, a kind of predestination in relationships or even affinities. Something like “fate” or “destiny”, but none of these words is, in my opinion, true enough to what yuánfèn represents. This is what I base my relationship with China: A series of unexpected events that led me to get close to the language, the culture, and finally the people of this incredible country.

I am Violeta, a Swiss-Mexican Spanish teacher in Shenzhen, and this story is a brief recount of the happenings that have led me to where I am today.

 

From Mexico to China: A journey to the other side of the planet

Growing up in a bi-cultural family, my curiosity and sensitivity toward languages were never lacking. However, I never imagined studying Chinese. My Chinese journey began rather sporadically and was born, really, out of a sudden impulse on a lazy afternoon. Looking back on all the things that could have linked me to this mystical country, I attribute it to yuánfèn. I could trace my connection to Chinese back to my childhood, when every birthday I would ask my parents to take me to the only Chinese restaurant in town to celebrate. Or when I pasted the image of my Chinese Zodiac (龍) in my high school yearbook. But I cannot attribute any real merit to these fortuitous events, a reflection of the power of yuánfèn. It wasn’t until college, though, that I learned about China. On a random afternoon, I came across the university’s language course schedule posted on a bulletin board. By process of elimination, because Italian and Portuguese seemed too “simple”, I ended up enrolling in a Chinese course.

Two hours a day, five days a week, our amazing Shanghainese teacher Xu Yiwen sowed the seed of my love for China, its language, and its culture. Towards the end of that year, an amazing opportunity knocked on our doors. An agreement with the Beijing International Studies University (BISU) had been signed and, two students would be selected for a one-year academic exchange. I remember the moment the teacher shared the news with us as if it were yesterday. I can clearly recall how I sprung off my seat and bolted out of the classroom to call my parents and ask them to keep their fingers crossed for me. Out of the blue, a possibility arose that I would never have considered in my wildest dreams: Traveling to China! After a couple of weeks, the excitement wore off and I began to doubt the chances of getting the scholarship. I had no connections (yes, guanxi is a thing in Mexico too). Hence, by the end of the semester, I had given up all hope. I didn’t even submit the paperwork. But yuánfèn did its job. Our lovely teacher applied for me, and I was informed on Valentine’s Day 2009 that I had been awarded the scholarship. I was to travel on March 8th!

I remember my first impressions of the Northern Capital vividly. I landed at 10 a.m. on a much polluted Sunday morning, with temperatures well below zero. My first images of the city were of people wandering about, throwing out their trash, smoking a cigarette, having breakfast or just strolling around dressed in what looked like pajamas. What a sight! Cultural shock started sinking in little by little. Letrines, strong odors, huge crowds, curious glances, traditional hutongs alongside the much unexpected modernity… and I could go on to name a myriad of fascinating things that took me a while to understand, but which I ended up falling in love with.

Beijing was life-changing. Experiencing the four seasons for the first time, sharing day-to-day life with classmates from dozens of different countries, some of which I couldn’t even accurately place on a map. It seemed unreal, like a piece of fiction in the fabric of my life. I fell so deeply in love with my Beijing life that I requested and managed, against all odds, to extend my stay for a second year.

We celebrated so many birthdays together at our local hangout with the most multi-cultural and fun group of people. (May 2011)

 

From the classroom to the office: Working in a Chinese company

I returned to Mexico in 2012, but a portion of my heart stayed in China. Although busy catching up with college, I found every possible opportunity to practice my Chinese. I ate Chinese food almost every week. I spent my afternoons watching非诚勿扰, I thought about China every day. After graduating, yuánfèn knocked on my door once again. A post on social announced an International company looking for people fluent in Chinese and Spanish. My first thought was, “I am not at all fluent in Chinese”. I had no confidence in my rusty Chinese, but after hesitating for a few days I decided I had nothing to lose (other than 面子) by trying, so I sent my CV without much hope. Within two weeks I received a call. The young man who interviewed me was also a BISU graduate. What are the odds!

I got the job at a Chinese oil drilling company in Southeast Mexico. It wasn’t my French degree that got me a job, it was my two years in Beijing. With this experience, I learned about China from a new perspective: the corporate environment.

Back to the classroom: For the love of China

I always wanted to pursue a master’s degree, and I always wanted to return to China. What I didn’t know is that I would do both at the same time. I started looking into scholarships. By March 2016, I had sent in my application. Without waiting for the outcome of the university’s selection process, I bought a one-way flight to Beijing and submitted my resignation. My acceptance letter from Nankai University came in two weeks after leaving the company. I was accepted on a full scholarship for three years.

In August 2016 I landed at the BIA and as I stepped off the plane, it felt like coming home. It is a difficult feeling to describe with words, as if I was escaping one reality to land in another, in an alternate world, a dream that I never stopped dreaming. My arrival in Tianjin felt more like a simple move to a new house than like a transition to a completely different reality on the other side of the planet.

This move marked the beginning of the rest of my life. I met my husband online. I never believed in online dating, but was bored and wanted to make new friends. Yuánfèn was working hard, again. We fell for each other pretty quickly. By 2019 we had signed our “little red book” and organized a full-on traditional wedding in rural Hebei. Our marriage has been a trip through the mountains. Moving forward slowly, up and down the hills, but enjoying the marvelous scenery along the way. We are learning from each other day after day, merging our cultures and broadening each other’s understanding of the world.

 

We are living in Shenzhen since 2020, with two cats and a fish tank. And while we are enjoying life in the hustle and bustle of this ultra-modern city, we look forward to a future back in Mexico. Although we don’t know when, we know that at some point it’s going to be his turn to immerse into my culture and discover where I come from: a tiny little town on the coast of Oaxaca, in southern Mexico. We see ourselves strolling on the beach every sunrise with a dog chasing the waves, maybe a couple of toddlers playing in the sand, and our memories of China always present in our morning conversations. Some day, if yuánfèn permits.

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